Recently I was waiting in line at the bathroom in Point Reyes Station when a young girl suddenly ran ahead of me to see if a cubicle was free. My immediate thought was “Hey little girl, wait your turn!” However, instead of speaking these words I paused and observed the expression on her face. She looked just like me at that age, with dark brown hair and freckles around her nose. I shifted my perspective and asked gently, “Do you need to go ahead of me?” Her face changed from intensity to delight. “Oh I’m fine. Hey look at that spider on the wall.” And our eyes followed the spider with curiosity.
The next day a friend shared a dream that she’d had the night before. She’d seen me visiting my daughter at Point Reyes. My daughter had been crying because I rarely visited, but when she saw me she was overjoyed.
In this lifetime I do not have a daughter, but I do have an inner child who I have neglected over the years, choosing to ignore her feelings and needs. Maybe it’s time for me to fully embrace this sweet child of mine and find the deep inner peace that lies within this reconciliation.
I wonder whether the spider that appeared in the waking version of this story was perhaps a magical symbol of the creative power that links the past with the future, the real with the unreal.